My Olympic Run
There isn't a day that goes by when I haven't received a sweet email, a touching card, a precious gift or a picture of Trent and I that someone took at a concert of us. There isn't a day that goes by when I don't wake up crying out for Trent just to hold me because I had a horrible dream about losing him.
I'm realizing my dreams are real, the pain is real, the questions and tears are never ending, and yet in my second breath of the day I say with the littlest of strength, "Jesus I love you...Trent I love you". And I know He meets me right where I'm at to carry me through the rest of my day.
I still say with all of my heart, "Thank You!" I could write a book about all the love that I've felt from you all.
Well, our house is quiet again and I find myself relaxing by the fire place tonight after a week end full of great anticipation, emotions and family. My Olympic Torch Relay Run was this morning and what an amazing morning it was for me.
Over the last couple of days, family all drove in or flew in and I had a house full of 12 people just waiting to support me in my Olympic Run today in honor of Trent. Last night I found it really hard to fall asleep, but I think my heart stopped beating so fast and in just enough time to allow me to fall asleep for about 4 hours before I had to get up at 4am. My brother in-law Ken drove me to my starting point. I had to be there at 5:30am to get ready for my 7am run. I was then told that I was one of only two support runners to run with the torchbearers for a 7 mile stretch. I just about feel over with a leg cramp right then when I heard that. (laugh) I asked if they needed another support runner. They said, "Yeah, that would be great!". So I then nominated my brother in-law Ken, who was also Trent's best friend. The Official Committee took a moment to discuss it and when they returned they handed Ken his Official Olympic outfit.
I smiled and didn't say too much because I felt once again the words that so many of you have shared with me and prayed over me..."Tammy, you're not alone!" Jesus made that very clear to me again at that moment as my brother in-law and Trent's closest friend would now be running with me to support me and make sure I wasn't alone!
I ran the second segment of just a little over a mile and a half and yes, I got to carry the torch for a moment. Then Ken finished out the relay running about 2-1/2 to 3 miles. What an incredible day for me and my family.
I had a "Hope" medallion and a "True Hero" medallion that my family had given me to put in my pockets, but my outfit didn't come with pockets, so I duck taped them to each of my socks! (smile)
Before I left my house this morning, I read a note that Trent had given me a year ago....
"Tammy, 10 years and I still love to stop and look deep in your eyes. I've learned that even though I desire to protect you in every way, my greatest peace and your greatest protection is to continually give you to the Lord. And now with some things changing all around us, and the world seems to move too fast, don't forget...I'll be right beside you, loving you. What I feel for you is deep, total and enduring. I will always be a love you can count on without ever having to wonder. So when you look to future changes or think of the past, don't forget to look beside you, because that's where you'll find me, loving you with all my heart. Love, Trent"
Trent, you are my "True Hero" and you'll always be until that day when I can touch your face again and feel your breath. Today was my honor to run for you baby...and I will run for you everyday of my life. I love you endlessly and it's forever!